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Totus Tuus

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it's been too long Nov. 1st, 2007 @ 11:43 pm
Wow. Being home with mono makes you remember crazy things, like that journal you kept starting right before you left for college. After reading almost all of my old entries I have decided to start writing in this again. Not that any of the people who used to read it and comment have kept up with theirs so I will be basically writing for myself, but I'm okay with that. Some years down the road I can read all these entries again and feel the same nostalgia I am feeling now.

So what has happened in my life? Well I began dating a good friend of mine, Kyle, back in November/December of my junior year of high school. We had met on my college visit when I was a senior in high school because I stayed with one of his friends and I vaguely remember him driving me to Walmart during that trip. Anyway, we became friends sometime during my freshman year at school and were not romantically interested in each other until the semester we began dating. We got engaged about a year later and, after graduating college in May, were married this past July 14th in Connecticut.

We currently live in a little apartment in Houston, Texas where Kyle is from. Kyle is a pilot and I am a preschool teacher. Actually I am currently not allowed to be at work because of the mono so I currently sit on our couch, playing around on the internet and watching Gilmore Girls episodes and the extended version of Lord of the Rings. Life is absolutely blissful. I love being married and Kyle is an amazing husband. I love him so much. Reading my old entries about discernment make me laugh because when I was stressing over past crushes and such I never imagined that I would be married to Kyle. God is so good.

That's all for now. Lord of the Rings is calling.

Pax Christi.
Current Location: marital bliss
Current Mood: chipperchipper
Current Music: Lord of the Rings

you can't touch this- theology of the body style Jul. 31st, 2005 @ 07:50 pm
so i wrote this because i had the original version stuck in my head but i think mine is a lot better... it is to the tune of can't touch this by mc hammer:

My-my-my hormones hit me so hard
Make me say, "oh my Lord thank you
For blessing me with a way to love with my body."
It feels good but i know it's not right.
I'm saving myself until my wedding night.
My body was given by the King
So without a ring
You can't touch.

I told you homeboy
You can't touch this
Yeah, that's how I'm living and you know.
You can't touch this
Look into my eyes, man
You can't touch this.
Yo let me show you my chastity ring.
You can't touch this.

My white dress and your new tux
You may think that this waiting thing sucks
But God's plan can't be beat
i wanna hear the pitter patter of little feat
Man of God
Hold on
Be proud to let em' know what not going on
Just wait
Just wait
Waiting for marriage makes it great
With God at your side, it's not too much
So let the whole world know
They can't touch

Yo! I told you
You can't touch this
No life long fidelity, man?
You can't touch this
No wedding bells? Read theology of the body!
You can't touch this
Can't touch this!
Current Mood: amusedamused
Current Music: my new song

cramps Jul. 31st, 2005 @ 01:02 am
sometimes i hate my uterus...
Current Mood: annoyedannoyed
Current Music: mc hammer- can't touch this

i hate this feeling Jul. 29th, 2005 @ 06:14 pm
since sixth grade, one of my biggest struggles has been trusting people... i am starting to wonder if i will ever get over it. i mean, almost all of my closest friends have let me down. (with the exception of ally, my household sisters, my marian crew, and a few select guys) why should these new friends from texas be any different? i am so sick of people hurting me and walking all over me, and i am sick of believing that people care about me just to find out that they really don't. i almost want to stop contact with them, just to keep myself from being hurt by them. i don't want to find out that all the love i thought they had for me wasn't real. i know i can't stop talking to them just because i am scared, but it scares me that i want to because that shows how hurting i am.

i wish garrett knew how badly he hurt me. jerk.

i really need prayers.
Current Mood: confusedconfused
Current Music: friday i'm in love

all about me Jul. 27th, 2005 @ 08:13 pm
TELL ME ABOUT YOURSELF - The Survey
Name:Sarah Ann Bernadette
Birthday:October, 9th 1985
Birthplace:Hartford, CT
Current Location:Colchester, CT
Eye Color:green, sometimes grey, sometimes blue
Hair Color:light blonde
Height:5'7"
Right Handed or Left Handed:right handed
Your Heritage:irish, german, french, english, native american
The Shoes You Wore Today:white flip flops
Your Weakness:boys... cute, sweet, funny, holy boys
Your Fears:being hurt
Your Perfect Pizza:red potato pizza in willimantic, ct
Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year:pray more, love me
Your Most Overused Phrase On an instant messenger:lol
Thoughts First Waking Up:i want to sleep more, stupid daycare job
Your Best Physical Feature:hair, eyes, smile
Your Bedtime:usually around midnight
Your Most Missed Memory:my semester in austria, especially the times in rome
Pepsi or Coke:neither
MacDonalds or Burger King:burger king for sure!
Single or Group Dates:single
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea:actually, snapple peach iced tea
Chocolate or Vanilla:chocolate (as any real woman would agree!)
Cappuccino or Coffee:coffee
Do you Smoke:nope
Do you Swear:nope
Do you Sing:not well at least
Do you Shower Daily:usually
Have you Been in Love:what is love? baby don't hurt me! don't hurt me! no more! (i used to think i had been, but no)
Do you want to go to College:i go to college... so yeah
Do you want to get Married:if i don't become a nun... it is 50/50 right now
Do you belive in yourself:sometimes... not as often as i should
Do you get Motion Sickness:not usually
Do you think you are Attractive:somedays... again not as often as i should
Are you a Health Freak:nope
Do you get along with your Parents:yes
Do you like Thunderstorms:yes
Do you play an Instrument:nope but i wish i could play the violin
In the past month have you Drank Alcohol:nope
In the past month have you Smoked:a cigar... my second ever
In the past month have you been on Drugs:nope
In the past month have you gone on a Date:nope
In the past month have you gone to a Mall:yes
In the past month have you eaten a box of Oreos:not in one sitting...
In the past month have you eaten Sushi:nope
In the past month have you been on Stage:yes
In the past month have you been Dumped:nope
In the past month have you gone Skinny Dipping:nope
In the past month have you Stolen Anything:nope
Ever been Drunk:i wish i could say no
Ever been called a Tease:nope
Ever been Beaten up:nope
Ever Shoplifted:nope
How do you want to Die:marytrdom sounds good
What do you want to be when you Grow Up:i want to do some kind of ministry
What country would you most like to Visit:i want to go back to italy so badly!
In a Boy/Girl..
Favourite Eye Color:no preference
Favourite Hair Color:brown
Short or Long Hair:short to medium
Height:haha although i always go for shorter guys or ones my height i'd like a taller one (but any height will do except like more than three inches shorter)
Weight:normal
Best Clothing Style:hehe as long as he isn't smelly
Number of Drugs I have taken:none
Number of CDs I own:they all got stolen in rome!!!
Number of Piercings:just my ears
Number of Tattoos:none
Number of things in my Past I Regret:all my sins

CREATE YOUR OWN! - or - GET PAID TO TAKE SURVEYS!
Current Mood: chipperchipper
Current Music: rascal flatts- i melt
Other entries
» waiting for mr. incredible
if i ever get married, the guy will pretty much be the most incredible guy ever because it is going to take a lot of work to sweep me off my feet...

but i'm worth it.
» every inside joke ever
in the year of 2003 sara will wed robespierramabob, i will finally be 22, and we will both say whoops sorry as we discuss our lives over lunch and refuse to hitch hike home. this will all result because i stole a couch cushion. and then we will build a tim hortons at the top of an alp we imported to the USA from austria. from there we will procede to watch a weird irish movie until three in the morning while eating nachos and we will take the movie out of the ra office using an invalid ID.

thats all.
» update

so, i am in need of a major update but there is just so much to say so i will stick to the basics.

i just got back from my ACTS retreat. about thirty people flew up from san antonio to help us out with it and it was so amazing! i seriously love the texas people so much and i miss them a lot. they showed me such love and i am so blessed by them! one of the people there really affirmed me a lot. he always expressed (and freely) how much he saw Jesus in me and how much he loved me. it was such a blessing because as it would turn out, it would be exactly what i needed to hear. (but more on that later.)

he introduced me for my talk and he said how honored he was to be indroducing me and how much i had touched his heart and how even though he didn't get to talk to me that often, how i always said that right thing whenever we did. he also said he saw me as a person who was passionately in love with Jesus. hearing all those things coming from him meant so much.

he wanted me to hear this song called sweet illumination, so he played it for me. it was so beautiful! he said it reminded him of me everytime he heard it because he thought of me he just saw a glow and because i am sweet. i wish he knew how much that meant to me because i have never had a song before, especially one so beautiful and about Jesus too! i decided to paste in the lyrics but for the whole effect, you would have to hear the song.

one thing, one thing
this is what i desire, this is what i desire
sweet illumination, sweet illumination
that i may gaze upon His face
o, to know this man

sweet illumination, sweet illumination
to glory in the presence of the King
behold the sweet essence of this one thing
that i may know the Spring within me
as it rises the Spring, so sweet


» new car!!!
I GOT A NEW CAR!!!!!!!

i'm not allowed to take it to school until senior year but I GOT A NEW CAR!!!!!!!!!!!

i love my family!
» daycare is fun
i am back to work, this time at a new daycare center. i have to say that although the staff i work with is about a million times better, i am slowly starting to think that the kids are future juvenille deinquents! no joke!

example a: we will call her, ashley... on the first day the kids were asked to tell me their name, age, and favorite color. when it came to her she responded, "ashley, age ten, and gold because it is the best credit card color." weird for a child the age of ten, huh? well it gets weirder. she then proceeded to ask me if i had a boyfriend. when i responded no, she asked me if i had ever had one and when i said yes, she asked me if i had dumped him or if he had dumped me. she draws pictures of posessed cows, she made a voodoo doll out of duck tape, her favorite shows are the simpsons and charmed, and she thinks "all boys are good for nothing idiots." yeah, i know... scary! but she has her redeeming qualities, good heart, great with the other kids, generally quiet. basically, she is in need of prayer.

i have seen almost every kid swear, hit, bite, scratch... and i have only been there three days. these are kids ranging in ages three to ten. i mean really... it makes me want to have kids of my own so i can raise them right! even if i become a nun, i will be a teacher and whip my kids into shape!

really though, despite the dicipline problems, i love working with kids. they are so open to everything... the pray grace before meals without worry or question. there is such a purity to children and it inspires me to be more like them and to protect them. it seems like they are becoming attacked younger and younger these days.

in other news, i am addicted to the rascall flatts song, fast cars and freedom. seriously, i must have listened to it like twenty times today.

i spent the night hanging out with my little sisters. we rented movies and got pizza and just hung out at the house. it was so nice to be able to spend time with them. i feel like i am never home and i just miss them so much. they really mean the world to me.

hannah, the twelve year old, is leaving for florida to visit my grandparents on monday. she is really scared so please pray for her. she says she has day dreams of God coming on to her plane and telling her to leave because the hurricane will hit it. to be honest, it scares me so badly. please pray for her protection. i just love her so much.

tomorrow i am heading up to steubenville east to see lauren do her young apostle thing for staurday night and to pray with the teens. i am so proud of her. i also get to see sara heim which is a major bonus. i miss her so much.

well i am off to play with the brand new laptop my parents surprised me with.

Jesus loves you and goodnight!
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